As the feature presentations themselves got bigger and bolder, the trailers that preceded them got worser and worser. As if the preview to Como Estas? hadn't been offensive enough, Como Estats? Dos! claims to be from both Spain and Mexico. I can only hope that joke was intentional.
Following that is a bona fide trailer. See, I was planning something big. Real big. It was called The Godfathers and it was to be my magnum opus. So sure was I that The Godfathers would set the world a-tizzy that I shot this teaser. Unfortunately, the result is hands-down the dullest thing I ever made. Oh my god, is it dull. This did not bode well for the feature film.
After that is a pretty miserable joke called Home Alone in the Field of Dreams followed by a commercial that takes advantage of the early-90s hackeysack craze (remember that?) by focusing on a Japanese sack I had come across with the words "Naughty elephant" printed on it. Look, I can spin backstories all day long, but it's not gonna make these videos any more bearable.
Hi. My name is Daniel Kraus. I'm a novelist and filmmaker.
When I was growing up in Iowa, I made movies with my friends.
Many of them were remakes of movies I liked, like MISERY or
THE GODFATHER. Others were originals.
All of them were awful. Now, to lead up to the publication of my new book, THE MONSTER VARIATIONS, I'm blogging my old movies chronologically for your enjoyment. Let's feel the pain together.